Skip to main content

30 years ago, Emergence...

Today was the 30th anniversary of the day I was birthed.

3 decades on Earth so far and what is it all for?

I'd like to think that my particular presence in space and time has meaning. That all the effort and resources my parents and teachers over the years have invested in me will somehow come to fruition.

I feel like I have accomplished some things that have been worthy of their contributions, but in some ways I feel like there is still so much to do to make it up to them.

I am still working on my BS degrees in Physics and Information Technology. There are many good reasons I have for such a drawn out timeline, but to me it is hard to swallow. I should be finishing my first PhD by now, but my choices in life have not manifested that reality. It is still my goal to accomplish someday, but I have become more comfortable with the way things have turned out so far within the given timeline.

I have learned that since, as far as I can determine, there is only one of me, and time seems to progress in a sinusoidal pattern, that living tends to become a process of determining what is most important at a given moment and trading all other possible actions and resultant outcomes for the actions and outcomes of the highest priority path choice.

*** First blogger lesson learned ***

Well I have been tapping away at hundreds of keys for the last hour for a really great birthday post. There were like 10 paragraphs past the one above. But, some how I just tapped something wrong and it all just was erased. It is late and I was on a freeflow thought dump, so I don't remember what I typed, It is just gone.

So here is my 30th birthday advice,
When writing a really long blog, do it in a text editor that lets you save as you go. That way you get at least two benefits.
1 - You can save and reload or undo serious mistakes.
2 - see #1

I will try to post the main point of what was lost tomorrow... or not.

-Ziv

Comments

  1. Oh no! 10 pharagraphs...

    I am on my way to 30th, what a relief now that I know I must blog all the heavy thoughts on a text editor *first*. >:*)

    10 pharagraphs, now that is frustrating. I am sure some really great insights were just lost into cyberspace.

    >:*(

    Grrrr....

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Shattering Reality...

Here I sit, in peace. Surrounded by the shards of my broken illusions.I don’t know everything, but I do know all.All is one in motion…The water is the cloud, the cloud is the rain, the rain is the stream, the stream is the river, the river is the ocean, the ocean is the cloud and the cloud is water.I am stardust, I am a single cell, I am a baby, I am a child, I am a youth, I am an adolescent, I am an adult, I am elderly, I am stardust.Reality is transition, it is the Delta.I am “Delta Stardust” in the behavior of the dust I find myself.Without the transition, I am not.I used to fear what was to come, the next instant in time was a terror in the back of my mind.We felt it more as children, the boogey man of reality under our beds.The constant anticipation of the nightmare, that waits for us in the next moment.Now I know that there is nothing to fear, that things are unfolding as they have been since before matter formed.It is a flow of energy, changing forms, through me, through you.Ca…

The wave crashes...

Today I saw the wave, it was a slow moving rise in the ocean.
As it approached, I could feel the water pull toward it, like a massive breath in.
Then the swell, it was incredible, from low to high, the power was impressive...
I am watching the life of a soul drawn in to its own rhythm.
Breathe in... Breathe out, it is such a simple concept but at the same time such a powerful and critical pattern.

So here I breathe, as my soul crashes upon the shore. I am the wave, I am the ocean, I am the rhythm of life. The patterns of survival. It is all here and at the same time, everywhere.

What should I say, is it contrary to the natural patterns to want more?
To seek the truth of the patterns. To find the source of the pain.

All I want is a day filled with light, to have the clouds not rain down on me, but to feel the warm sun on my shoulders. The light of the star telling me it is okay, that I can move on and that tomorrow will be brighter than today.

It is too much to ask? Have my years of …

Textual Mind Erosion...

It is still a mystery to me how we are able to transfer concepts and thoughts from one mind to another via text on screens and in pages. But, yet it seems to happen everytime I let my eyes and mind connect for a session of blissful, detached yet mindful, reading of glorious texts. Is there really a transmission of new thoughts from the characters or does the text somehow unlock the understanding that already exists within my mind. Is it like the potential energy of a boulder that has always been on the side of a cliff, but takes years of erosion to be uncovered and transition to kinetic?

I tend to read many books at the same time and start new ones before I finish others.
This may not be the most effective way to read texts, but, I am not always in the same mood when I sit to read, so I have many books of many topics and styles so that I can grab whatever seems most interesting at the time. The titles with a splat in front of them are what are currently in progress, the others are fig…